Lately I have felt a little overwhelmed, confused, and uncertain. My mind has been racing as I think about decisions I need to make in the coming weeks and months. I've been trying to figure out all my options, weigh the pros and cons, and properly navigate through the decision-making process. In addition to that, serving in a place like Haiti is overwhelming in itself. Trying to help these communities and care for these children in the best possible way is a complicated process. There are multiple projects going on simultaneously, all with their own needs and priorities. And while I've been in Haiti, I have learned about several situations at home that are burdening my heart. People I love are hurting. They have been faced with difficult situations at work, at home, and with their health. A dear friend of mine is fighting the battle of her life with cancer. Some of my own family members are in the midst of personal struggles. Another friend of mine needs peace and direction during a trying time in her life.

My mind has been overloaded thinking about all of these decisions and situations. Part of me has felt anxious to get home so I can help, encourage, and do whatever else is needed to comfort and assist my friends and family at home. I have felt unsettled about my own future as I think about all the decisions that need to be made and feel pressured to know and make the best ones. I have been praying for God to speak to me and grant me wisdom and peace.

Last night as my mind was flooded once again with all of these things, I was reminded of a psalm that I've heard a few times since I have been in Haiti. In a couple of the church services here the congregation has recited some of the psalms from memory. One is Psalm 23 and the other is Psalm 46. Psalm 46 speaks of events such as the earth giving way, the mountains falling into the sea, and the waters roaring. As I sit here at this base, often looking out across the sea, I can imagine that if those events really started happening, we would tend to be fearful. But in verse 2 the author says "we will not fear" though these events are happening around us. "We will not fear" because (from the first verse) "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble." I read slowly through the rest of the psalm, letting the truth of God's word really sink in. And then I got down to one of my favorite verses in the Bible, Psalm 46:10: "Be still and know that I am God."

Two commands. First, be still. Second, know that I am God. It is interesting that the command to be still comes before the command to know that He is God. The verse does not read: Know that I am God and be still. It reads: Be still and know that I am God. Perhaps this is because sometimes we need to stop... physically, mentally, and in every way in order to fully process and accept our knowledge of God--remembering and realizing once again who He is. He is God. Creator of all. Sustainer of life. Furthermore, if He is God it means I am not. He desires and deserves complete control over my life. And that includes not only my actions but my thoughts as well. I need to first be still. Stop thinking. Stop worrying. Let go and lay down. All of this busyness inside of my head is stealing my joy and unsettling my peace. God desires neither of those to happen. He sent His Son that my joy would be made complete (Phil 2:2). The joy of the Lord is my strength (Ps 28:7). And He blesses His people with peace (Ps 29:11). Peace that surpasses understanding (Phil 4:7). If I don't have joy and peace it is because of something I am doing or not doing and nothing to do with God.

Going back to verse 1... God is ever-present. He is always with us. Emmanuel. God is my refuge. I paused at that word "refuge" to define it. What does God as my refuge mean for me? When a refugee is running for his life, what does a refuge mean for him? Safety. A place to get food, shelter and rest. God is my refuge. My safe haven. My nourishment. My rest. He is my strength. And if He is the source my strength, I am not. So if I am empty... it's ok! Let Him fill me. Let Him be strong when I am weak (2 Cor 12:9-10).

Be still. And know. He is God. He is in control. He has a plan. Let go of the reins. Lay down your concerns, your fears, your own plans and desires. Jesus says, "My yoke is easy and my burden is light," (Mt 11:30). Believe Him. Rest in Him. Let Him restore you (Ps 23:2-3). Be still and know that He is God.